Thought I’d Be Feeling a Little More Sentimental This Morning

I’ve been awake since 4:30…. four thirty!!!!  I laid in bed for an hour and a bit before finally realizing sleep wasn’t coming, and decided the blog that was forming in my head as I lay awake might as well be written.

It’s the first day of school for my eldest, and no way did I think I would have time to blog today.  Or that I would be so grumpy… yes I thought I would be a little more sentimental today.

Actually I when I finally did decide it was no longer night, but now morning, I turned on the light to read my friend Kate’s blog.  Now there’s a mama feeling nostalgic about today… the way I should be… while I am simply grumpily dragging myself out of bed looking for coffee only to find we have to grind more coffee beans… which will wake the kids.  I’ll wait.

But as I laid in bed frustrated with a mixture of my husband being up to work out, my own bladder, my son’s bladder, and the need to check on my youngest who is now in a big boy bed, tossing and turning, I realized I was up for the day.  On a very big day for our family, I am awake.  At 4:30 am.  School doesn’t start for almost five hours.

Then my neighbour started drumming (I think) at around 5:15 or so.  I try to be a patient neighbour, seeing as our household is not a quiet one, but I did briefly imagine myself walking over and pounding on their garage door in the most unChristian-like and un-neighbourly fashion.

I actually really like our neighbours.

I feel jet legged.  Y’all, I’m really not a morning person.  I complain when I have to be up at 6:30/7… which is like every. single. day.  I have begged God to make me a morning person.  It’s been coming a long… very slowly.  My kids are morning people, that has certainly helped??  4:30 is NOT morning.

My hubby is home now from his workout, I sent him downstairs to the basement immediately to grind more coffee, only to realize he couldn’t sleep either and hadn’t planned to be up quite that early either.  And actually when I had turned the light (thinking Ben was up) on so that our son wouldn’t have to use the bathroom light to do his business, I had actually sabotaged his last half hour of sleep.  Oh the irony.

Yep.  Winner right here.

On my son’s big day, I am grumpy.  Strangely, I don’t even desire to go back to bed because I know sleep wouldn’t come anyway.

So I think I will have a cup of coffee with my husband, spend time with Jesus, and maybe make some banana bread.  Yes, I think I want some banana bread.

We have almost three hours ’til school and I’ve already been awake for an hour and a half.

The scripture “rejoice always” is going over in my head over and over.  Right now all I can think about is the fact that my ear and head hurt, I needed those two hours of sleep, and instead I’m up with the farmers… farmers get up that early right?

Well, it’s time for me to put off my carnal self and get my mind renewed.  Truly a challenge today.  But regardless, enough complaining, I’m going to rejoice (said through gritted teeth).

That’s the thing about being a mom.  I don’t have time to whine about how tired I am, today is about my big guy going to school for the first time.

Oh Jesus help me.  I’m pretty sure that’s all I did, whine to Jesus about not being able to fall back asleep for an hour when I could have been up scrubbing floors or jamming with the neighbour (just kidding that was not going to happen).

I can’t afford to set the wrong atmosphere this morning for my son.  This is an exciting day for him.  Probably later I will blog about how I bawled my eyes out right there outside his classroom.

For all of you out there about to send your little’s to school, or who have, may you have a very blessed day…

Well, coffee’s ready!  I hope you got to sleep until at least 6 am.

 

4 thoughts on “Thought I’d Be Feeling a Little More Sentimental This Morning

  1. A new chapter in your life. I’m excited to hear about his first day at school. The grumpiness will pass and you will have good memories to enjoy in the days to come. Love ya💖

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m thinking the coffee helped perk you up! First days of school were all bittersweet. It’s the beginning of an exciting adventure for them and a big letting go moment for the parents. Life has a new normal. I’m excited to hear how it went!

    Liked by 1 person

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